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The B Lane Swimmer
原文：https://holly.witteman.ca/the-b-lane-swimmer/
A number of years ago, I joined a Master’s swim team. I was doing triathlons at the time, and the swim was my weakest leg. The team I joined divided the pool into four lanes: A (fastest swimmers), B (next fastest), C (next fastest) and D (slowest.) Workouts were organized accordingly; faster swimmers were assigned more and/or faster laps.
I came to the team as a very strong swimmer compared to the average person. These were not average people. I was nowhere near the level of these guys. (They were almost all men, though every so often there would be one other woman at practice.) So I started in the D lane and got lots of remedial stroke correction. Everyone around me was very kind to me, I slowly improved, and finally made it into the C lane. The people whom I had swam next to for months welcomed me warmly.
I noticed that when I swam next to the B lane swimmers, they were not nearly as kind and friendly as the C lane swimmers had been when they were my next-lane neighbours. The A lane swimmers were extremely nice, and were generous with encouragement, praise and tips. This wasn’t a hard and fast rule, but I started to notice a pattern: A, C, and D lane swimmers tended to be nice, friendly, and helpful to pretty much everyone; B lane swimmers tended to be nice to A lane and other B lane swimmers but not so much to C and D.
When I stopped doing tris and moved back to field sports, I started to notice the same thing. The very top athletes were nice to everyone and so were the middle and bottom of the pack. The not quite top players, though, were less friendly. They played more political games, and acted out their threatened feelings of being not quite good enough by being snobbish to those below them. (In retrospect, I worry I did some of this, too, especially when I was playing on a top team but was not a top player. I definitely felt a need to prove myself.)
I have since noted the same phenomenon in nearly every domain, including academia. The truly great researchers are generous and friendly; so are many of the middle of the roaders. Those who have something to prove, though, and who feel like they aren’t quite managing to do it, show definite aspects of being B lane swimmers.
译文：https://www.ruanyifeng.com/blog/2024/02/weekly-issue-290.html
几年前，我参加了一个游泳训练营。
所有人在一个泳池训练，按照水平分在四个泳道：A 道（游得最快的人）、B 道（次快）、C 道（次慢）和 D 道（最慢）。
我从 D 道开始，接受了大量的指导。周围的人都对我很好，我慢慢进步，终于进入了 C 道。那组的人也热情欢迎我。
但是，我注意到，旁边 B 道的人并不像 C 道那样友善。A 道选手都非常友善，慷慨给予鼓励、表扬和提示。
我怀疑这是普遍现象：A 道、C 道和 D 道的人都很友善，大家几乎都乐于助人；B 道的人则是对 A 道和其他 B 道选手友善，但对 C 道和 D 道则不然。
因为我后来发现，其他运动领域也是如此。那些仅次于顶级选手的运动员，往往对不如自己的选手很苛刻，害怕别人超过自己。
学术界也有这种现象。真正伟大的研究者慷慨而热于助人，许多普通水平的研究者也是这样。然而，那些有一定知名度、但又没有做出顶尖成果的研究者，对不如自己的人就不友善了。
当你是最好的 A 组时，很容易表现得宽宏大量，你确信自己会有成果，这让你安心无忧。
当你处于平均水平或低于平均水平（C 组或 D 组）时，表现得友善也很容易。远离顶尖水平，意味着竞争压力不大，所需要付出的努力可能也不大，你会有一种”放轻松”的心态（反正我到不了顶峰，就当作玩呗）。
那些仅次于优秀水平的人，感受到最大的竞争压力。你离顶峰如此之近，追赶却又艰难无比，放弃又不甘心。最令人沮丧的是，没有人记得第二名。同时，后面的人还可能超过你。所有这些因素，都可能导致一种不友善的态度。
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为什么要离开小地方？因为小地方庙小妖风大，池浅王八多，最可怕的不是赚不到钱，而是人心不正的多，事也不少。狗咬人，咬的是生人，人咬人，咬的是熟人。
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过去的三十多年，我们的发展就像是一匹脱缰的野马那样一路狂奔，我们全体都在后面大汗淋漓地追赶，我们追赶的步伐常常跟不上发展的速度。展望今后的十年，我觉得，或者说我希望，我们发展的速度应该慢下来，这匹脱缰的野马应该跑累了，应该放慢脚步了。 余华：《我们生活在巨大的差距里》
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父爱则母静，母静则子安，子安则家和，家和万事兴；父恶则母苦，母苦则子惧，子惧则家衰，家衰败三代。
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苦事不宣，乐事不扬，闲事不管。
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能说服一个人的，从来不是道理，而是南墙；能点醒一个人的，从来不是说教，而是磨难。
爷叔《繁花》台词
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